Wednesday, May 30, 2012

AxMan Update

Time for an update on the boy...aka AxMan. haha This moniker should probably change as he's hoping to switch jobs soon, but I guess he'll always be AxMan to me. ;)

Anyway...back to the story! So in my last post, I mentioned that I saw him 3 out of 3 days...that is no longer correct, I've seen him 6 of 7 days. 6 days in a row. I think that is some kind of record for me! Seriously. I've always lived at least 45 minutes away from any guy I've ever "dated." It's really cool to have him so close. I'm not sure how thrilled mom is with it since he's been at the house almost every one of those days, but we usually just hang out and watch tv or listen to music. The only reason I didn't get to see him last night was because he had a last minute opportunity to have his girls for a few hours. I certainly didn't want to interfere with that. Yesterday was our first rough patch in the relationship. (He officially asked me to be his girlfriend on Saturday night. And I said yes. It was kinda cute. haha) We had a bit of miscommunication, which will happen when you can only text and not talk face to face (since we were both working). We worked it out though, somewhat. This morning we finished sorting out our little misunderstanding. All is well again. I'm sort of relieved we've gone through something already. It showed me that either one of us can have a bad day and unintentionally push away the other, but that neither one of us are budging. It's pretty darn cool. I know he's sticking around. I realize I owe you all more of an explanation than that, but I'm not ready to give up all my real-life details just yet! ha Thanks Kayla for being there via text last night to remind me to just "go with the flow." I'm certainly the happiest I've been...possibly EVER. Also big thanks to O & K who don't blog (but now read this blog! ha) but are lifelong friends and have been so supportive no matter what! :) So now that we've worked out what was causing the confusion, I'm looking forward to seeing him tonight. It's ridiculous how comfortable I am with him. We've only been talking a little over a week. Today marks the one week point since we first met in person/had our first date. And yes, while I've never considered those things milestones in the past, it's nice to be with someone who remembers the little things like that and tells me.

Still being cautious, but I'm definitely optimistic. I realize you get hurt more the more you open yourself up to someone...this time I'm willing to take the risk. Stupid?

Monday, May 21, 2012

Decisions Decisions

I am generally not a wishy-washy type of person, but the past few months have been a true emotional roller coaster. Things have definitely been leveling off; however, I can't help but feel that things are still not as they should be. Have you ever felt that way?

Some things are going really well. Like the fact that I have managed to maintain consistent weight loss and still make good food choices despite the emotional turmoil. I have not turned to food at all. I can't say that I've ever been an emotional eater, but I have been one that would eat when I was bored. Now I stop to ask myself if I'm fooling myself into thinking I'm hungry or if I really am needing nourishment. Those of you who know me...know I LOVE wine and beer. Well alcoholic drinks in general. I'm Catholic, what can I say?! ha It's been a bit more of a struggle to not have a drink when having a great meal that would be complemented by a drink (like steak and potato on the grill...a nice cold beer OR fried rice and baked chicken...a nice wine). The one weekend I did binge on beer (hey, I had a reason - Brew Bracket & a Purdue trip!), I paid for it for 2 weeks trying to lose that 3 pounds. UGH! I saw this on a blog my childhood friend, Lauren, sent me and it resonated with me. Victory will be mine!

One area that is not going so well is work. Don't get me wrong. I feel blessed to have a job that I like well enough and that pays better than most in this area. I am still majorly struggling with the decisions being made by our corporate office. Several others who do similar jobs to me are feeling the same pains of these changes. I feel that although the individual company I work for is doing well, we will go down in flames with the rest of the corporation due to their changes. I am constantly job searching, although I  have not applied anywhere in about a year. I wish my Scentsy business was at the level above where I am right now (we seem to be stuck as a team) so that I would feel more confident in venturing to something new. And being able to know I have Scentsy as a cushion. To add to my confusion over work, I continually get emails from Gonzaga about their online master's program. It was the last school I applied to a few years ago. I really really like their program, but my goal has been to completely wipe out my debt (not something I'd be accomplishing by adding in education payments). I just don't know if I have the energy to work full-time, exercise like it's my job (seriously I have to in order to keep losing the pounds), make time for Scentsy & Velata parties (because I want that to be my job), have time for dating (if I ever find someone who wants to date me AND that he is date-able - a new post coming on this soon!), and of course find the mental capacity to focus on studies (should I decide to pursue my Master's).

Feeling jumbled yet? I am!!! Along with those issues is of course drama with boys. ha I told my cousin Z about the ending with the electrician (we had dinner Friday night together - cousin not the "dad") and he was floored. He kept stopping our conversation and saying, "Really? Who freakin' does that?!?" I know, I know. My life is a soap opera. haha I know it'll all happen in good time. But with all those other things floating around my head, I often wonder if I even have what it takes to juggle everything at once. I know plenty of others do it. Maybe I just don't want any of it bad enough?? hmmmm...another new thought to ponder. I have some funny stories and not-so-funny stories to tell about trying to date on Match & OKCupid that I will get typed up sometime in the near future. Promise.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Weekend Fun

This weekend was busy. Friday was by far my favorite day...and coincidentally, the only day I took any pictures. hmmmm

Anyway...a quick recap!


Took my acrylic nails off for a break...trying shellac for the first time!

Got these swim goggles in the mail from my SSD for the Punta Cana trip!

mmmm...pitcher of Dos Equis XX downed with my cousin Z

Indiana sunset

bonfire with friends


Busy, long day. After going to bed WAY past my bedtime, I had to get up early to go grocery shopping with mom. Then we delivered a roasting pan to the neighbors (my cousin's cousins...get that? ha) since they were preparing food for the ATV Poker Run that day. I made a trip into town to tan. Trying to keep some color before PC! Then I worked out...a lot. I mean an extreme amount of calories needed to be burned so I could keep up with plans of the day! Had a quick bite to eat at home before my friend (& Scentsy team member), Noelle, came down to borrow some product for a show she had over the weekend. I finally showered for the day and got myself ready. Made the 1.5 hour drive to Bedford for a Scentsy & Velata party. So much fun! Got to see my sorority sister, Kortni, who has been a major supporter and inspiration in my weight loss! I also have a new recruit in one of the people attending the party. I was supposed to get back and go join the after party at the bonfire, but I was so tired when I got back and most of the crew had decided to do a night ranger ride, so I just came home. Mom spent the day on the ride with my cousins.


Today I slept in, but is it really sleeping in if you got less sleep than a normal night? Ugh. I am really struggling here lately. I can't seem to fall asleep and then wake up a million times a night. So after not much sleep and waking up with a headache, I jumped right into my exercise. Part of the day included a nice 2 mile walk on our country the hot sunshine! ha This afternoon I finished getting my monthly Scentsy customer mailing ready and did some more laundry. After an ionic detox and a shower...I have been a bum! To tell you how tired I've been, I took a 30 minute nap yesterday and an hour nap today. I swapped out purses's a Coach purse I bought awhile back and wasn't going to keep for myself, but it's been growing on me because I look at it sitting there every day since I've bought it. haha

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Also, since I'm not selling my Coach purse, if you know anybody looking for an Acer Iconia tablet (AT&T), I have one for sale! Just email me and I'll send you all the details. I love it, but I just don't use it enough to justify the cost of having an additional monthly bill ($15 for the AT&T service).

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

1 Year Anniversary

I have been a Scentsy consultant for 1 year!!

It's amazing how fast the time flies...and it's been an incredible year as part of this phenomenal company! Seriously. What other job can you have that puts extra money in your bank account, gives you free dream vacations to tropical destinations (Punta Cana next month!), and brings amazing people into your lives through outstanding products?!?

I'm offering a special from now until May 31st to celebrate my 1 year anniversary. If you'd like to know what those specials me at!

Thanks to all of you who have supported me this past year! :)

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Fifty Shades

This post is a quick recap for my thoughts on the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy.
I had seen twitter posts and had heard a little about the book awhile back, but honestly didn't pay much attention to it. No one really said what it was about, they just kept posting that the book blew their minds and they were unsure of how to feel. I thought that was a bit dramatic, so I just kept ignoring all the talk and didn't even look up the book. My good friend, O, and I were texting last week and she mentioned in her last text that she would forward me her copy of the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy...that I MUST read it. She said she started out shocked, but that the books were great. I said okay, send 'em and I'll give it a go. (And if you have the kindle app...I'd be glad to forward you these 3 books!)

Holy smokes.

I. HAD. NO. IDEA. I seriously still hadn't read even the book synopsis before I started reading this series. haha I am not going to say I was shocked about the book material itself (can't lie...I read smut books all the time), but I was surprised that the people who I'd seen talking about it had read it. ;) It's a book that borders the edge of so many boundaries...but it's intriguing, gritty, and thought provoking. It makes you look at unconditional love in a new way. For someone like me (who's never truly 100% been in love with someone) and by all accounts is a "good girl" it made me look back on relationships I've had with a new insight and it makes me even more ready to move forward into a relationship. And not, not for the sex...although, does anyone really complain about having it good in that department? haha Some of the situations the book delves into were eerily like my real life (and no, not gonna share which ones), but it still leaves me at a loss as to whether or not I show that same unconditional love. I have always thought I'd be able to, but it scares me that I might not have it in me. Ana was patient and gave Christian the benefit of the doubt. I feel like I've tried to do that in one of my relationships, but I don't think I'm strong enough to maintain that for the long haul. Just one of the many thoughts I had while reading the book.

All in all, I would highly suggest everyone to read these books. If you read a synopsis and think you really can't handle it, then that's your choice, but I couldn't put the books down. I read all 3 in about 4 or 5 days.

For those who've read the book...I laughed when I saw this, so I had to include it as the finale to this post.



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