My Heart is Happy

So, as you all know from reading my gibberish everyday...there's a wonderful guy in my life (aka AxMan). Yesterday I met his daughters (aka Katniss & Lorraine - more on these monikers in the following paragraphs!). If you read yesterday morning's post, you'll know I woke up feeling like everything was right in my world. Such a good feeling! :) That feeling only intensified throughout the day. Last night, AxMan and I were texting after he went home...and I told him that for the first time, I felt complete. He replied that he did as well...and that his girls were the happiest he'd seen them in a long time. *melt my heart* I had a lot of those heart melting moments yesterday...I've always known in my heart (since I was very young), that I was born to be a mother and a wife. Crazy? Maybe. Yesterday just cemented that for me. No matter what form it comes as in the future.


I had plans to meet AxMan and his daughters in Greensburg for lunch when mom and I were up there getting groceries for the week. I got a text while I was getting ready asking if he could just stop by and say hi real quick and pick up the mini fridge. (He's borrowing our mini fridge.) I was sort of confused because I thought he was panicking and pulling a stunt like I dealt with before (with Electrician). I told him I wasn't quite ready yet (I was dressed, but no makeup and wet hair up in a towel...yowza), but he said I'd like beautiful no matter what and the girls wanted to meet me. I combed my hair and put on a smile...and they were here! I took Toby outside with me to meet the girls and he soaked up all their attention. What a ham! We stood there talking and carrying on for about 30 minutes. When the girls were off playing with Toby and petting our other dogs, he told me he hadn't really had the money for lunch (it's been tough for him lately), to which I replied that I had planned to treat them all to lunch anyway. I hadn't told him because he's a man and very prideful. ha He had a hard time accepting it, but eventually said if the offer still stood, the girls would love to spend more time with me (as would he) and they'd still join us. So, after he ran to his sister's to pick up some of his yard equipment (he does landscaping on the side), they met mom and I at Storie's for a delicious...and quite funny lunch. I don't think we lacked for conversation at all. The girls are bright, funny, and sweet. They seemed comfortable with me and mom. I even sat by the girls and AxMan sat on the other side of me. The younger one was having trouble cutting up her chicken strips (kids are so funny with their habits, but then so are adults!), so I asked if she wanted help and she handed me her plate so I could do it. He looked kinda funny at me and asked if it was okay, that he could do it. I told him it was fine, I wouldn't have offered if I didn't wanna do it. ha Men! :p Sometimes they just don't get we show our affection in a million different ways. Lunch lasted about 1.5 hours! Craziness. It flew by and I'm so glad I got that time with them.

Mom and I went on our merry way to get groceries and AxMan took the girls to his mom's while he mowed a few yards nearby there. I was standing in line to pay (you know good ol' Wal-Mart can only have 3 lines open when there are a BILLION people trying to check out...grrrr) when I got tackled! hahaha There was Katniss & Lorraine! And here came their daddy...smiling and laughing. He needed a few things and didn't think they would see me, but the girls were apparently on the lookout for me. ;) So I got to talk to them a few more minutes while we waited in line.

That evening he picked up a pizza and brought the girls over to watch a movie. On the way over...our text convo looked a bit like this:

AxMan: I plan on some hugs and kisses tonight. Just so you know.
Me: Are we allowed to cuddle during the movie?
AxMan: I just asked the girls and they said yes to cuddling. ha
Me: How about those kisses? ;)
AxMan: I asked. I got eye rolling and smiles. Yes, we've got the green light. ;)
Me: Glad to know we have approval! haha


I have never had to get permission to hug or kiss a boyfriend before...but I'm glad the girls approve. The pizza & movie were actually their idea. They wanted to see me again! AWWWWWWWWW How cute is that?? If you can't tell, I'm just as smitten with them as with their dad. The girls quickly ended up being bored with the movie and they wanted to talk. So they sat on the floor amidst the pile of pillows and blankets I had out for them, playing with Toby and asking me questions while I was curled up on the couch in AxMan's arms (per usual). At about 10:30, the girls said they were tired, but they didn't wanna leave me. So AxMan told them to lay down and when they were ready to go home, he'd get them up. ha They enthusiastically covered up with my Purdue blanket (did I mention his major flaw is that he's an IU fan? hahaha). He jokingly told them they were grounded. haha The girls then asked me to take a picture and post in on Facebook. I didn't post it on FB cause I didn't know if he was ready for that, but I am gonna post it here and I did text him the pic! Katniss ended up falling asleep on my bed, but Lorraine was wound for sound the entire night! They ended up waking Katniss and going home around midnight. Not an exciting night by any means, but a perfect one in my book. :)

Okay...so the reasons for the girls names. The oldest girl is 12 and is completely obsessed with Hunger Games. She has dark hair, is learning to shoot a bow, and has boots like Katniss wore in the movie. AxMan has a picture of her on his phone with her hair pulled back, shooting the bow, with her boots on...she looks very much like a young Katniss! The youngest girl is 9 and quirky sweet. ha She is blonde and precocious, much like the character Lorraine (that Dakota Fanning plays) in Uptown Girls. And there you have it...Katniss & Lorraine. He told me throughout the day that the girls NEVER stopped talking about me. Before they left last night, they even hugged me!! Seriously, how can you not get attached when it's like that? And yes, I know I could be setting myself up for huge disappointment, but for once, I'm not going to let any doubts or fear of getting hurt stop me from giving all of myself. They were already asking AxMan when they would get to see me again. The girls were trying to wrangle an invite for today...and of course, that would be fine with me. He admonished them for inviting themselves over, but of course, I know he loves it just as much as they do, so it wasn't too firm on that. ;)

And now for some pictures. Sorry, AxMan and I have not yet taken a picture together because I usually have no makeup on when he comes over to hang out. Honestly, I'm lazy after a day at work, exercising and showering...so I don't bother putting makeup on for the second time in the day...and he prefers me without it. I plan to remedy that this week/upcoming weekend. So, for now you have to settle for a picture from Easter that his cousin took of him watching the kids play in the yard at their family get-together. He looks much younger in person when he's smiling and joking around. But for the most part, this is him. And then the rest of the pics are of the girls from last night.

A Quiet Morning

I know most people are not morning people...that is not me. I LOVE mornings. L-O-V-E. Sitting alone on a quiet morning does something to restore my soul. Weird? Maybe.

This morning I woke up a half hour before my alarm was set to go off...heck, it still hasn't gone off! ha I let Toby in my room and he's currently snuggled beside me on the couch, but he's a pretty quiet partner when he's sleepy. ;) As I sit here listening to a few birds' chirps cutting through the peacefulness, watching the sun filter through my curtains...I'm struck by how "right" things feel at this moment in time.

I don't even think I can begin to explain why or how things feel right. Yesterday a former co-worker called in to talk to the boss man, but he was out, so he ended up talking to me....he laughed because he said he was surprised I still worked there. It's kind of sad that so many people feel like my job is beneath me. No, I don't even come close to using my arsenal of skills and I do enjoy being challenged on the job, but I also enjoy surprising people with my abilities from time to time. I've never shunned work. I grew up having to work and work HARD. Sure, I complain about my job, but it's not because I don't feel it's worthy work, it's because I disagree with how the corporate office thinks they should manage things. The thing is...at this job, I'm probably about the happiest I've ever been. I am finally to a pay level where I make as much as I did at my former fave job (working for the federal gov't), but the people definitely make it a good one. Plus, if you haven't noticed...I'm a homebody. I prefer to be close to my family and friends. Sure, I still miss city living and the conveniences, but in the end - I'm just a small town girl who loves her fresh country air, the wide open spaces, and the slower pace of life.

I need my daily exercise to energize myself (although it's a pretty great bonus to be consistently losing weight - I've now officially lost over 60 pounds!). I live for weekend trips to Indy to see Jenna (& Noelle) or to Lexington to see Zach. I love that my uncle, aunt, and cousins include mom and I on their endless ranger riding trips over the backroads of the area. I enjoy being able to work towards paying off my debt. I get so excited that everyone around here knows I sell Scentsy and comes to me for last minute gifts or to re-stock their supply...and I truly get a thrill from watching my team members achieve big things!

And on top of all those things....right now, I enjoy spending time with AxMan and being part of each other's lives. Later today I hope to have something new (and good) to tell you about this as well (and yes, Missy, pictures). As I was typing this post, I realized how appropriate "his song" to me is for my life in general at this moment in time. Definitely going to try hard to be HERE in everything I do. To appreciate everything that's gotten me to this point in life, good and bad.



Thank you God for an amazing day to be cognizant for all that I have and do! Enjoy your weekend, friends! :)

AxMan Update

Time for an update on the boy...aka AxMan. haha This moniker should probably change as he's hoping to switch jobs soon, but I guess he'll always be AxMan to me. ;)

Anyway...back to the story! So in my last post, I mentioned that I saw him 3 out of 3 days...that is no longer correct, I've seen him 6 of 7 days. 6 days in a row. I think that is some kind of record for me! Seriously. I've always lived at least 45 minutes away from any guy I've ever "dated." It's really cool to have him so close. I'm not sure how thrilled mom is with it since he's been at the house almost every one of those days, but we usually just hang out and watch tv or listen to music. The only reason I didn't get to see him last night was because he had a last minute opportunity to have his girls for a few hours. I certainly didn't want to interfere with that. Yesterday was our first rough patch in the relationship. (He officially asked me to be his girlfriend on Saturday night. And I said yes. It was kinda cute. haha) We had a bit of miscommunication, which will happen when you can only text and not talk face to face (since we were both working). We worked it out though, somewhat. This morning we finished sorting out our little misunderstanding. All is well again. I'm sort of relieved we've gone through something already. It showed me that either one of us can have a bad day and unintentionally push away the other, but that neither one of us are budging. It's pretty darn cool. I know he's sticking around. I realize I owe you all more of an explanation than that, but I'm not ready to give up all my real-life details just yet! ha Thanks Kayla for being there via text last night to remind me to just "go with the flow." I'm certainly the happiest I've been...possibly EVER. Also big thanks to O & K who don't blog (but now read this blog! ha) but are lifelong friends and have been so supportive no matter what! :) So now that we've worked out what was causing the confusion, I'm looking forward to seeing him tonight. It's ridiculous how comfortable I am with him. We've only been talking a little over a week. Today marks the one week point since we first met in person/had our first date. And yes, while I've never considered those things milestones in the past, it's nice to be with someone who remembers the little things like that and tells me.

Still being cautious, but I'm definitely optimistic. I realize you get hurt more the more you open yourself up to someone...this time I'm willing to take the risk. Stupid?

Decisions Decisions

I am generally not a wishy-washy type of person, but the past few months have been a true emotional roller coaster. Things have definitely been leveling off; however, I can't help but feel that things are still not as they should be. Have you ever felt that way?

Some things are going really well. Like the fact that I have managed to maintain consistent weight loss and still make good food choices despite the emotional turmoil. I have not turned to food at all. I can't say that I've ever been an emotional eater, but I have been one that would eat when I was bored. Now I stop to ask myself if I'm fooling myself into thinking I'm hungry or if I really am needing nourishment. Those of you who know me...know I LOVE wine and beer. Well alcoholic drinks in general. I'm Catholic, what can I say?! ha It's been a bit more of a struggle to not have a drink when having a great meal that would be complemented by a drink (like steak and potato on the grill...a nice cold beer OR fried rice and baked chicken...a nice wine). The one weekend I did binge on beer (hey, I had a reason - Brew Bracket & a Purdue trip!), I paid for it for 2 weeks trying to lose that 3 pounds. UGH! I saw this on a blog my childhood friend, Lauren, sent me and it resonated with me. Victory will be mine!

One area that is not going so well is work. Don't get me wrong. I feel blessed to have a job that I like well enough and that pays better than most in this area. I am still majorly struggling with the decisions being made by our corporate office. Several others who do similar jobs to me are feeling the same pains of these changes. I feel that although the individual company I work for is doing well, we will go down in flames with the rest of the corporation due to their changes. I am constantly job searching, although I  have not applied anywhere in about a year. I wish my Scentsy business was at the level above where I am right now (we seem to be stuck as a team) so that I would feel more confident in venturing to something new. And being able to know I have Scentsy as a cushion. To add to my confusion over work, I continually get emails from Gonzaga about their online master's program. It was the last school I applied to a few years ago. I really really like their program, but my goal has been to completely wipe out my debt (not something I'd be accomplishing by adding in education payments). I just don't know if I have the energy to work full-time, exercise like it's my job (seriously I have to in order to keep losing the pounds), make time for Scentsy & Velata parties (because I want that to be my job), have time for dating (if I ever find someone who wants to date me AND that he is date-able - a new post coming on this soon!), and of course find the mental capacity to focus on studies (should I decide to pursue my Master's).

Feeling jumbled yet? I am!!! Along with those issues is of course drama with boys. ha I told my cousin Z about the ending with the electrician (we had dinner Friday night together - cousin not the "dad") and he was floored. He kept stopping our conversation and saying, "Really? Who freakin' does that?!?" I know, I know. My life is a soap opera. haha I know it'll all happen in good time. But with all those other things floating around my head, I often wonder if I even have what it takes to juggle everything at once. I know plenty of others do it. Maybe I just don't want any of it bad enough?? hmmmm...another new thought to ponder. I have some funny stories and not-so-funny stories to tell about trying to date on Match & OKCupid that I will get typed up sometime in the near future. Promise.

Weekend Fun

This weekend was busy. Friday was by far my favorite day...and coincidentally, the only day I took any pictures. hmmmm

Anyway...a quick recap!

FRIDAY

Took my acrylic nails off for a break...trying shellac for the first time!

Got these swim goggles in the mail from my SSD for the Punta Cana trip!

mmmm...pitcher of Dos Equis XX downed with my cousin Z

Indiana sunset

bonfire with friends

SATURDAY

Busy, long day. After going to bed WAY past my bedtime, I had to get up early to go grocery shopping with mom. Then we delivered a roasting pan to the neighbors (my cousin's cousins...get that? ha) since they were preparing food for the ATV Poker Run that day. I made a trip into town to tan. Trying to keep some color before PC! Then I worked out...a lot. I mean an extreme amount of calories needed to be burned so I could keep up with plans of the day! Had a quick bite to eat at home before my friend (& Scentsy team member), Noelle, came down to borrow some product for a show she had over the weekend. I finally showered for the day and got myself ready. Made the 1.5 hour drive to Bedford for a Scentsy & Velata party. So much fun! Got to see my sorority sister, Kortni, who has been a major supporter and inspiration in my weight loss! I also have a new recruit in one of the people attending the party. I was supposed to get back and go join the after party at the bonfire, but I was so tired when I got back and most of the crew had decided to do a night ranger ride, so I just came home. Mom spent the day on the ride with my cousins.


SUNDAY

Today I slept in, but is it really sleeping in if you got less sleep than a normal night? Ugh. I am really struggling here lately. I can't seem to fall asleep and then wake up a million times a night. So after not much sleep and waking up with a headache, I jumped right into my exercise. Part of the day included a nice 2 mile walk on our country road...in the hot sunshine! ha This afternoon I finished getting my monthly Scentsy customer mailing ready and did some more laundry. After an ionic detox and a shower...I have been a bum! To tell you how tired I've been, I took a 30 minute nap yesterday and an hour nap today. I swapped out purses today...it's a Coach purse I bought awhile back and wasn't going to keep for myself, but it's been growing on me because I look at it sitting there every day since I've bought it. haha

- - - - - -
Also, since I'm not selling my Coach purse, if you know anybody looking for an Acer Iconia tablet (AT&T), I have one for sale! Just email me and I'll send you all the details. I love it, but I just don't use it enough to justify the cost of having an additional monthly bill ($15 for the AT&T service).

1 Year Anniversary

I have been a Scentsy consultant for 1 year!!

It's amazing how fast the time flies...and it's been an incredible year as part of this phenomenal company! Seriously. What other job can you have that puts extra money in your bank account, gives you free dream vacations to tropical destinations (Punta Cana next month!), and brings amazing people into your lives through outstanding products?!?

I'm offering a special from now until May 31st to celebrate my 1 year anniversary. If you'd like to know what those specials are...email me at emenchhofer@yahoo.com!

Thanks to all of you who have supported me this past year! :)

www.savorthescent.com

www.easybreezyfondue.com

Fifty Shades

This post is a quick recap for my thoughts on the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy.

I had seen twitter posts and had heard a little about the book awhile back, but honestly didn't pay much attention to it. No one really said what it was about, they just kept posting that the book blew their minds and they were unsure of how to feel. I thought that was a bit dramatic, so I just kept ignoring all the talk and didn't even look up the book. My good friend, O, and I were texting last week and she mentioned in her last text that she would forward me her copy of the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy...that I MUST read it. She said she started out shocked, but that the books were great. I said okay, send 'em and I'll give it a go. (And if you have the kindle app...I'd be glad to forward you these 3 books!)

Holy smokes.

I. HAD. NO. IDEA. I seriously still hadn't read even the book synopsis before I started reading this series. haha I am not going to say I was shocked about the book material itself (can't lie...I read smut books all the time), but I was surprised that the people who I'd seen talking about it had read it. ;) It's a book that borders the edge of so many boundaries...but it's intriguing, gritty, and thought provoking. It makes you look at unconditional love in a new way. For someone like me (who's never truly 100% been in love with someone) and by all accounts is a "good girl" it made me look back on relationships I've had with a new insight and it makes me even more ready to move forward into a relationship. And not, not for the sex...although, does anyone really complain about having it good in that department? haha Some of the situations the book delves into were eerily like my real life (and no, not gonna share which ones), but it still leaves me at a loss as to whether or not I show that same unconditional love. I have always thought I'd be able to, but it scares me that I might not have it in me. Ana was patient and gave Christian the benefit of the doubt. I feel like I've tried to do that in one of my relationships, but I don't think I'm strong enough to maintain that for the long haul. Just one of the many thoughts I had while reading the book.


All in all, I would highly suggest everyone to read these books. If you read a synopsis and think you really can't handle it, then that's your choice, but I couldn't put the books down. I read all 3 in about 4 or 5 days.

For those who've read the book...I laughed when I saw this, so I had to include it as the finale to this post.

:)